I must have known Jim getting on for
30 years, first as an auditor and then as a work colleague. I visited him and his wife Marjory at their
home in Barrhead about 10 years ago and have had an open invitation to return
and stay for a weekend ever since. As so
often happens life seemed to get in the way and I never got around to taking
them up on their kind offer until now. I
decided that 2016 had to be a year of getting things done and so arrangements
were made on the one proviso that we spent the Saturday at a football match not
fly fishing (his hobby).
So straight after work on Friday I
headed up to Barrhead and enjoyed an evening of generous hospitality and
catching up on what had been happening.
I also discovered that Scotsmen have a very different concept of what
constitutes a ‘small one’ when it comes to malt whisky! After a few bottles of beer from the local
Kelburn Brewery and several ‘small ones’ I retired to bed slightly wobbly and
knowing I’d had a drink.
After a breakfast of square sausage and
tattie scone in a soft roll, a bracing stroll and spotting this sign it really
did start to feel that I was back in Scotland.
So to the football. The local junior side Arthurlie FC were not
playing so we had to go out of Barrhead.
I have already seen the National Side and Scottish Premier football at
Pittodrie so I fancied going down the football pyramid. I didn’t want to go to see a big side so
Rangers were out, leaving Greenock Morton, who were at home to Dumbarton making
a sort of cross Clyde derby an obvious choice.
Arthurlie FC
The journey to Greenock was slightly
grim, being sleety rain or rainy sleet, hiding what a really nice view along
the coast road. The Scots probably have
an expression to describe such weather, just as the Eskimo has 40 ways of
describing snow, it seems to me that the Scottish have an endless vocabulary to
describe the dour and downright miserable.
As I was to see on the drive back when the weather was cold but fine and
clear the view of the snow covered hills and across the Clyde was really quite
magnificent. Greenock, like Port Glasgow
is on a strip of land developed along the river bank hemmed in by the Clyde on
one side and hills on the other. Sadly
like many areas ‘up North’ the local heavy industry based on ship building and
the dock had declined but there were signs of the shoots of redevelopment and
new life.
Morton’s ground Cappielow Park is
squeezed in there and with its low stands, were it not for the floodlights, it
could be overlooked. We headed for the
home section turnstiles and a friendly steward tried to point us in the
direction of the away end. It was then
that the penny dropped, Dumbarton were playing in amber and black. “No mate this is a Hull City scarf” was my
response showing him the Tiger badge.
His response was “bloody hell what are you doing up here! On to the cash turnstiles (there’s a novelty;
take note Hull City) with the pretty reasonable £17 admission (£12 for
concessions).
Inside it was get a programme (£2)
and survey the sight of an old school proper football ground. Uncovered terraces behind the goal, one with
bench seats, best stand with seats to the left and a big covered standing area to the
right known locally as the Cow Shed. It
was here we went to stand and more explanations from me as to the temerity of
wearing a black and amber scarf in the home section to the amazed locals.
The Cow Shed
The first half started at a brisk
pace with Morton taking the upper hand in early exchanges and striking the goal
frame twice. They were missing chances
though and the delivery from the left wing could have been better. Just as I was wondering whether they would
allow themselves to be mugged there was a clumsy collision and Nade, who I
thought represented the best chance of this happening, came off worse going down clutching the top of
his thigh. It was a Souness-esque studs
rake (Nade showing the referee the hole in his shorts) though with no obvious
intent, more of an accident. There seems to be an unwritten
law that a bash to a man’s sensitive areas results in laughter rather than
sympathy; only heightened by a female physio coming on to a few choice comments.
However she was unable to repair the damage and he eventually limped off. The stalemate continued until half time, with
Morton ‘ahead on points.’
No warming whisky this time, after
last night’s session, instead a hot pie.
Scottish food gets its share of critics, yes some of it is not healthy
but in moderation bridies, rowies and square sausage are champion and Jim came
back with another great, the scotch pie.
These were piping hot with a firm stuffed filling and a slightly greasy
lid, so much better than a prawn sandwich!
During the interval some ‘big lads’ came onto the pitch and took
penalties. They were part of a local
health initiative backed by the club encouraging mature men to get fit and lose
weight. Most had some way to go but were
given encouragement as well as the odd joke and it’s a positive thing to see
clubs getting involved in community projects. Football being a power for good.
The second half was more of the same
with Morton making the running and Dumbarton’s best chances being on the
counter or set pieces. The breakthrough
came on 64 minutes when Johnson slotted home after a previous shot had been
blocked. From then it was pretty
comfortable until McKee got on the end of a slick passing move and put it
beyond doubt.
Half way through the second half it
occurred to me that there had been no singing and no real chants, just the odd
shout of ‘Ton’ or ‘come on Ton’. What
there was though were let’s describe as Anglo Saxon comments towards the
pitch. As players tired and clumsy
collisions started to occur that went from a trickle to torrents of abuse and
few were spared! It was like being in a
40 year time warp and funnily enough it seemed good natured or at least not
genuinely malicious. One Dumbarton player who
was particularly a target came over to clap the Cow Shed mob at the final whistle and this seemed
to go down very well.
All in all a good match with some
decent passing football played and well worth the visit. Next time I am in the area I won’t hesitate
to make a return visit.
Then it was back to Jim’s and more
hospitality. A great weekend.
Morton 2 (0) Dumbarton 0 (0)
Johnstone
(64), McKee (88)
Morton
McNeil, Pepper, Kilday, Lamie, Russell, Barr (Tidser 87),
McKee, O'Ware, McCluskey (Forbes 83), Johnstone
(Samuel 90), McManus
Substitutes: Miller, Forbes, Scullion, Tidser, Samuel, McGowan
Dumbarton
Ewings, Buchanan, Barr, Wright, Saunders, Cawley (Heh69), Routledge, Walsh, Docherty, Fleming (McCallum 65), Nade (Gallagher 31)
Substitutes: Brown, Taggart, Gallagher, Kirkpatrick, McCallum, Waters, Heh
Referee: George Salmond
Attendance: 1,595
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